Hermione's Chance
by SocietysSake
Summary: The trio is back for their final year at Hogwarts. However, Hermione is nervous to have to face Severus Snape again after some very touching moments when she saved him. Will things get settled before she makes her place in the world? Does not coincide with DH. Please read and review. Rated M for safety.
1. Chapter 1

It had been a full year since the second Great War, and the wizarding world was still trying to pick up the pieces. So many people had been lost in the aftermath that it was a wonder if we'd ever find those still missing. Luckily, I had those who still mattered to me, for the most part anyways.

My parents had died shortly after I had erased their memories and most days I still felt the hole left in my heart. Ginny and Harry were stronger than ever now and there was little doubt that we all would be hearing wedding bells soon. Ron and I had ended as friends, realizing that there was nothing between us romantically. He was now thoroughly involved with a witch from University who was nothing like me, thankfully. The Weasley Clan was taking it a day at a time, especially Fred who was adjusting to life without his other half. Hogwarts itself was still standing. The walls and staircases that had been damaged were quickly repaired and all the six years from the term before were about to be attending their make-up year, myself included. A part of me was happy at the return to routine. However, I felt more alone now than I ever had before. Ron and Harry had tried their best to fill in the void that my parent's loss had created, but it all felt wrong. They should be happy now that they could have lives outside the wreckage. So instead of sharing my feelings and mourning 'properly', I hid them away and let everything be immersed by work and studying.

A week before our arrival to Hogwarts, I was given three job offers that I still contemplated without telling anyone. The first was a Ministry job that sounded about as enticing as a dip in the lake with leaches and alligators. Don't get me wrong, it had prestige and would pay beyond well. But being head of the Muggle-Wizarding affairs was not as challenging as I would like. The second was to become an Auror. Harry of course was up for the job as well and would take it, but I wasn't much interested in the life threatening career. The third, which I was leaning towards more, was a teaching position at Hogwarts. Headmistress McGonagall had sent an owl to me shortly after my return from London, offering me the slot of Charms Mistress. The idea was tempting, however I still wanted to talk to McGonagall face-to-face and see what all it would entail.

"It feels weird going back." Harry said as he sat by the window. I couldn't agree more honestly. It felt like Déjà vu as we sat on the Hogwarts Express, bound for the school that had brought us together. "I'm curious to see if Snape has returned." My body temperature spiked slightly, but I had gotten so used to hiding my feelings, neither of them noticed. After his attack from Nagini, Voldemort's pet, I had spent hours reviving him back to health. I couldn't let him die and had rushed back to the Shrieking Shack just in time to give him an anti-venom potion. His wounds had been extensive and since I was the first to attend to him, I had dealt with the brunt of them. When I had stripped the obstructing garments from him I had sealed and cleaned every bite mark. He was lucid through little of the weeks that I was attending to him, but the two times where he was in complete clarity had proven to be both emotional and too heartfelt. And when dealing with my former Potions Master, those were two things I was not used to.

"_Hermione, is that you?" His voice cracked as he spoke for the first time in two weeks. I went to his side immediately. "Yes, Professor, it's me." I replied and took a rag to his forehead. His fever was spiking again. His taut muscles tightened as he tried to sit up. "Oh, no. You have to stay down right now. You are in no shape to be up." I pushed him back gently but firmly. He fought me for a few moments but then gave up, losing his muster. "I don't need to be mothered Miss Granger." He tried to growl in his usual voice but it didn't quite make it. "This isn't mothering you. It's making sure you don't screw up all the work I've done on keeping you alive. Now shut up and rest." I retorted. I heard his chuckle before it turned into a cough. I rolled my eyes and wiped his neck and face again. "Thank you Hermione." His hand came up and squeezed mine before he passed out again._

_Days later, after he had whispered my name several times in his sleep…_

_I was reading the new _Potions Weekly_ to him when he came awake again. "Your voice sounds so nice." I looked up at him and was glad to see his face was gaining more color. I shifted forward and felt for a fever. "How long have I been out?" He asked as his dark eyes penetrated mine. "Three weeks." I answered and sat back again. He was finally out of danger. "Have you been here the whole time?" I nodded my head, unable to speak. His eyes never left mine. There were so many new elements in them that I was speechless. Laced into his irises were kindness, genuine sincerity, and gratitude in abundance. My mind could not compute. He then reached for my hand and squeezed it before lifting it to his lips and kissing my knuckles and fingertips tenderly. When his lips had skimmed the tender area of my wrist, my eyes had closed at the sensation. "Thank you Hermione, for everything. I owe you my life." His breath whispered onto my skin and I moaned so softly, I was unsure if he heard it. When I met his eyes, I knew that he had. Shortly after this, the healers came in and I was dismissed of my duties. I had kissed him goodbye and when I parted with tears in my eyes, I had looked back to see that he too was crying. We had exchanged several letters since, but he soon fell out of touch, recovering in solitude._

Those weeks had proven to confound me hormonally and emotionally, more so than any other time in my life. Though, with Severus becoming a recluse, I was never able to address my feelings, and therefore I put them away in the recesses of my mind. As school had approached, however, the emotions were attempting to overtake me again and I couldn't keep myself from wondering if he missed me even a fraction of how I had missed him.

"Let's hope so. I am curious to see who he is now that he isn't a spy anymore. Should prove to be very interesting." Ron replied lazily as he popped a chocolate frog into his mouth.

"I'm going to take a nap for a bit." I interjected, not wanting to stay on this topic. "Wake me when we are close and I need to change." Harry handed me his jacket for a pillow and I curled up in the corner. I was fast asleep before they picked up another conversation. I dreamed very little these days now that the nightmares had trickled away, much to my relief. Ron woke me at an appropriate time and I changed quickly so Ron and Harry could come back into the compartment. We didn't speak as we approached the school, preferring to stick to our own thoughts. The Great Hall had been returned to its former glory, looking exactly the same as it had our first year. We took seats and began chatting with our fellow classmates, offering hugs and congratulations where it applied.

"So he has returned." Harry whispered to me shortly. My head whipped so fast to the staff table, and sure enough, there sat our Potions Master. His hair was still at its shoulder length, but rather the greasy look we were all accustomed to, it had a silky quality that made me want to run my fingers through it. That was not the only thing that was different. His black attire from before had been replaced with a maroon vest, a European tie, and black slacks that were screaming expensive. He must have felt my stare because he turned and looked directly at me, a kind smile on his face. My heart fluttered slightly and I knew that a blush had adorned my face. First years filed in after a while and I found myself trying to distract my mind from Professor Snape as much as possible, to little avail. Every few moments I would look at him and wonder. He caught me a few times and at one point he even winked at me, sending my heart into near cardiac arrest. He knew, he had to know, that there was something still there between us. When sorting was finished and I had had my fill of dinner, I excused myself and left with one last look to Severus, who must have left beforehand. Ron and Harry said goodnight each and I walked to the dormitory in silence, something that suited me as of late. I was about to head up the last flight of stairs when Snape came out of a corridor.

"Hermione," he said as if it were his last breath. "How I've missed you." He reached for me and I embraced him without hesitation. He smelt of mint and it soothed me to no end.

"Professor, it's so good to see you back to normal. I've missed you as well." He stepped back first, to my reluctance. "How are you?" I asked as I searched his face. Apprehension crossed him while he viewed me from head to toe.

"I am well. I've been enjoying the life away from people." He put his hands behind his back, smiling shyly.

"I noticed." I replied softly and looked away, still feeling a little miffed.

"I'm sorry. I just figured that you needed to move on from…everything." His tone was a mixture of apologetic and guilt, as was his facial expression. I observed how his eyes roamed everywhere and never fell on me. "You have enough on your mind. I didn't need to be on it any longer."

"Just because I didn't see you or hear from you doesn't mean you weren't on my mind. I still worried about you and thought of you often." I admitted. My eyes bore into him, forcing him to look at me. When his dark eyes finally met mine, I almost fainted.

"I'm sorry to have distracted you." His voice was so low; I almost didn't hear what he had to say. With little thought to my actions, I stepped closer to him. His eyebrows raised in slight alarm. "Hermione, please don't do anything you'd regret." That halted me. Small roots of anger sprouted up my throat but I held them back. Regret? Oh, how I've already done so much I regretted. Before I could yell at him I pushed him back and welded my lips to his, my hands clamped onto his vest like vices. At first he went rigid but the more my lips coaxed his, the more he kissed in return. Before I pulled away, I snuck my tongue out and flicked it along his bottom lip, tearing a moan from his throat. When I did pull away I was out of breath.

"Now I won't regret a thing." I let go of him and walked away hurriedly, not wanting to hear him try to rationalize my feelings away. He called out to me but I forced myself forward, struggling with my hormones. I didn't wait for Harry or Ron in the common room once I made it. I was too irritated and hurt. Instead I went up to my room and shut my bed curtains on myself. I cried hot, angry tears, disgusted with myself for crying over a man. The fact that I had spent so much time thinking about his well-being and worrying about his life, and had developed feelings for him, I felt sick and wounded. Luckily I cried myself to sleep before Lavender and Pavarti came up. The last thing I wanted to do was explain to them why I was already in tears on the first night back.

In the morning, around dawn, an obnoxious tapping came from the window closest to Lavender's window, waking the three of us up. "Who in the hell decides to send an owl this early in the bloody morning?" Lavender whined as she opened her window noisily. "Hermione, it's for you. It says 'urgent'." Her voice was less groggy as she began to panic. I opened my curtains and took the parchment from her. Both her and Pavarti sat at the edge of Lavender's bed, waiting.

Hermione,

I apologize for the hour that you receive this, but I am being driven mad with confusion and my mind will not let me rest until we have spoken. Please, I beg, make your way to the dungeon.

I didn't need to question who this was from. I knew Severus's handwriting better than anyone else in the entire school. I chewed my bottom lip in contemplation, but in the end my humanity won out. I could not in good conscience let him lose sleep. "I have to go. If either of you see Ron or Harry, please tell them to go on to breakfast without me." I folded the note up and shoved it in my silk robe pocket after tying the sash around me.

"Is everything okay?" Pavarti asked.

"No. But hopefully it will be." I replied vaguely. Rushing out of there, I prayed that I wouldn't run into anyone on my way. I was not dressed appropriately and being that I was about to see a teacher, I sure as hell would be the talk of the school if seen entering a room alone with him in nothing but a nightgown and a silk robe. When I arrived to Snape's classroom, I found him at his desk, a quill in his hand, and half-moon framed spectacles resting on the bridge of his nose. The single candle he had lit was not near adequate lighting and I raised my wand, lighting the four others surrounding him. He looked up at me the minute the glow increased around him, a small smile on his thin lips. "If you worked in better lighting, you wouldn't have to strain your eyes so badly." I stated coldly.

"I'll remember that, thank you." He replied softly. His posture straightened up as I walked deeper into his classroom, my hands skimming across the tops of the desks as I passed. "I wasn't sure if you would come. I'm glad you did." I stopped a good two feet from his desk.

"Why did you want me to?" I asked. He scowled as if I should know the answer to my own question.

"You kissed me Hermione. We need to discuss this."

"You kissed me back Severus." I retorted acidly. "I'm pretty sure that means the situation is easy to understand."

"Why did you kiss me in the first place?" He questioned seriously after several moments. I felt like hitting him in the head with my palm like in the American V8 commercials. And he complained of Ron and Harry being dunderheads, Lord! I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms over my chest. "I don't appreciate the attitude Miss Granger. I'm very tired, thanks to your actions, and I am beyond understanding them." He sighed, frustrated.

"I don't appreciate your stupidity." I roared. "I don't appreciate how you had me on the verge of loving you, then you just pulled away. And even after all this time, after you ignored every letter these last six months, you show up and I still have such strong feelings for you and you act as if they are nothing. I still can't get you out of my head, out of my dreams." Tears of anger and sadness fought to the surface of my eyes, making the image of his shocked face blurry. "You are engrained into me from the day you took my hand and thanked me. And there is nothing I can do. No other man catches my attention the way you do. No man arouses me the way just the thought of you does. I'm stuck in this one-sided attraction that is tearing me apart." My arms tightened, keeping me from falling down and sobbing similar the weak child I felt like. "Ugh! I don't want to talk about this with you. I prefer to keep my pathetic emotions to myself. I'll leave you be Professor." Turning to leave, I wiped my tears away roughly. Just as I reached for the door, I heard it lock. I yanked it furiously, wanting him to realize that I had to leave. It was too painful to be here. However, no such luck. I heard the ruffling of fabric and felt his breath on my neck while his arms wrapped around me. I wanted to fight against it, knowing that if I gave in, it would only fuel the unhealthy situation. But he felt too damn good. I leaned back and inhaled the herb and mint smell that was him. My head rolled onto his shoulder and I closed my eyes, savoring the entire experience. None of my dreams brought justice to his being.

"The attraction isn't one-sided, Hermione." I heard him say into my ear. "But I cannot give you anything…good. I'm a broken, old man. I can't offer you anything other than dysfunction and agony. If I were more of a man, I would not hesitate to do as you want." The words he spoke made sense to me, I just couldn't, no wouldn't, believe them. His long fingers undid the tie on my robe and he moved the material from my left shoulder so he could skim his lips across the goose fleshed skin. I shivered in lust and I knew he was smiling without having to open my eyes. "You are too beautiful, too perfect." His mouth opened slightly against the curve of my neck and I had to bite my lower lip so I wouldn't moan. Once I had gotten my thoughts together enough to argue with him, I turned to look at him while still staying encompassed in his arm.

"I will be in even more agony if you push me away Severus. You see yourself far too harshly, and if you feel broken, allow me to help you put yourself back together. I want…to be with you Severus. Please don't turn me away…not again." I pleaded more with my eyes, hoping he would see my need for him. Watching his emotions at war with one another in his eyes almost brought me to tears. I put my head on his chest and breathed him in. "Don't leave me again." I whispered. His arms around me squeezed.

"I wish things could be different." He finally said, sounding resolved. I squeezed my eyes shut and refused to budge from him. His finger came up under my chin and lifted my lips to his. We kissed each other with something close to desperation. I pressed myself against him as hard as I could until it almost hurt. My body desired him, needed to be devoured by him. "Hermione," he tried to pull away but I pushed him against the wall and moved my lips down his neck. "Hermione, don't make this worse." He tried to push me away but I persisted in staying fused to him. I felt him harden against my stomach, calling to my lower body while it heated and melted into him. "Please…," he breathed. My mind finally registered that he wasn't compliant anymore. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry...," his tone was filled with pity, enraging me further. Was I not enough for him either? Tears, both sorrowful and heated, splashed onto my cheeks and chest. His arms left me but his hands moved to hold my forearms. "Please forgive me Hermione." I pulled away and left him there, unable to hear him plead. My body began to feel numb the further I walked away from him, steeling itself from the pain that threatened to shatter me.

Weeks passed and I ignored Professor Snape no matter the situation. I never looked at him and I wish I could say that I never thought about him. He was constantly on my mind, day and night. And the more I avoided him, the stronger the day dreams and fantasies became. On multiple occasions he tried to speak to me in class about normal stuff, but I would mumble something monosyllabic then go back to my task without so much as a glance to him. Harry and Ron noticed how withdrawn I became but didn't say anything thankfully. I believe Ginny had told them to leave me be. After two months, I faked coming around and only let my feelings out when I was alone in bed or when I hid, pretending to study. Finally, the first trip to Hogsmeade came and my relief to get out of Hogwarts must have been palpable because Harry made a mention of it at breakfast that day.

"I'm glad to see you smile Hermione. It's been too long." I looked up at him from my plate of fruit. His eyes were trained on me. Ron and Ginny hadn't wanted breakfast this morning so it was just the two of us.

"I'm sorry for my mood. I just…. I'm having trouble controlling things." I said unhelpfully.

"You don't need to apologize to me. I just hope you gave the man hell for hurting you." He took a bite of his eggs and chewed thoughtfully.

"How'd you know it had to do with a guy?" I asked, perplexed. Harry wasn't much attuned to people's feelings and didn't really pry. He chewed his next bite a little longer than usual, making an excuse for not answering right away. He swallowed.

"Well, do you want the truth?" I nodded. "Let's just say my Occlumency lessons have finally kicked in, even if I cannot control who I hear." My fork dropped, clattering loudly onto my plate. Well damn! I felt a deep blush rise up in me. Embarrassment didn't begin to cover what I felt. Indignation came close. "Don't be upset or embarrassed. Honestly, I think he is more your speed than anyone we know. He is smart, mature, and sees you for you."

"Too bad he doesn't want me." I mumbled, feeling sick to my stomach. I couldn't help a quick look to the staff table, just in time to see Severus taking a bite of a strawberry. My mouth dried up instantly. "Harry, you might want to try avoiding my mind right now." I said as an image of Severus's lips going somewhere equally as juicy but a whole lot warmer. I gulped and looked back down at my lap, trying to dispel the thoughts and arousal that seemed to invade me. I heard Harry's chuckle and picked up a piece of cantaloupe to throw at him. He went into a fit of laughter that shook his body. "Let's go. I want to get out of this castle soon and I still need to change into some jeans." I said while I stood.

"You do know that Snape is one of our chaperones?" I stopped and turned to look at Harry. "I have a very strong feeling the only reason why he volunteered to chaperone was so he could see you outside the school." He winked. "A very strong feeling." My heart pounded so hard I felt it in my temples.

"I'm not going." I stated in horror.

"Yes you are. You already promised Ginny you'd go. You can't back out. I'm not going to be around my girlfriend when she is upset and I wasn't the cause." I was about to argue when he continued. "Hogsmeade is a huge place. We can lose him quickly, you know this. We used to lose people all the time." My unease chipped away at me until I thought I might puke. But then Harry took my hand. "I got your back." And in that small way, I did feel better.

"Fine. Let's just go before I die." I replied. We walked together up until the common room then planned to meet in the courtyard in an hour. I went to my room and heaved a sigh of great magnitude. Lavender and Pavarti were already gone, forgoing breakfast for getting ready and leaving. I dressed in my comfy, stretchy jeans that still made my ass look great and my white button up shirt. I chose to do some light blush, eyeliner, and mascara before I pulled my hair into a chignon. My bangs swooped to the side and I loosened it up a bit so that a few stray curls came down around my ears and back. I finished up with my black TOMS and light black jacket. As I checked myself in the mirror one last time I decided to add my favorite shimmering lip gloss that tasted like peppermint and lasted all day. When I made it outside, Ginny was already waiting, her face eager. "Hey Ginny."

"Hermione, I am so glad you are coming with us." She hugged me quickly and we started small chat while we waited for Ron and Harry. I was so engrossed in our conversation while discussing Tonk's and Remus's son Teddy that I didn't realize Severus was standing right beside me until Ginny's eyes dilated to the size of a golf ball.

"Miss Weasley, Miss Granger." He bowed slightly to us. "Miss Granger, might I have a word?" My body tingled at his proximity but I held my ground.

"I'm sorry Professor, but we're waiting for people." That was the most I had said to him months and I felt constricted. He took my elbow in hand and dragged me away, his face stern. "Get your hands off—" He pulled me to face him away from everyone.

"I am tired of indulging this childish behavior Hermione. You are a grown woman, act like it." The urge to smack him was overwhelming.

"I am acting like a grown woman. I am cutting off all emotions for you and leaving you be, like you wanted." I snapped. He closed his mouth, clearly surprised. "You said you didn't want me. I'm not going to chase you again when it apparently didn't get me anywhere the first time. Nor will I have you dragging me along. I'm hurt Severus. And I won't allow it to go further when you obviously don't want it to." I moved to leave but he grabbed my elbow again.

"Hermione, please don't be this way." I rolled my eyes and pulled away from him, walking back to Ginny as Harry and Ron joined her. Harry's eyebrows rose but when he saw my face he looked up past me and made eye contact with Snape.

"Everything okay?" He asked while he continued to look at Severus who I assumed was staring back.

"Just peachy." I mumbled and dragged Harry by his shirt sleeve to Ginny's side. Ginny glanced at the situation several times before we walked to the carriages. Once inside, I sighed in relief and closed my eyes briefly. Ron sat next to, puzzled. Harry just looked out the window, trying not to bring too much attention to the situation. Ginny however, just stared and waited, expectantly. I ignored her as best I could by keeping my eyes shut. Her impatience lost her.

"What was all that about?"

"Snape being Snape." I replied sardonically. I heard her mouth open to say more and when nothing came I opened my eyes to see Harry hushing her by squeezing her hand. She "humphed" but let it be, mercifully. The ride went quietly after that and I breathed meditatively to relax. When we finally arrived I was calm and ready for some mischief, something my friends were very good at. "Let's get some fire whiskey first." I offered as we stepped out. All three of them looked up at me, surprised at my out of character suggestion. I didn't give them a chance to question and headed into The Three Broomsticks. They followed with big grins on their faces.

"I think we've been a bad influence on her." Ron said and nudged Harry. They laughed good-naturedly and sat opposite of me and Ginny in a booth by the window. Madame Rosmerta came up to us and took our order of four shots of fire whiskey and four butterbeers to wash it down with afterwards. She obliged with a smile and our drinks were on the table in no time at all. It felt good to be away from the castle, away from my haunting imagination for a while. I laughed and smiled with them as if nothing had ever been wrong. We finished our drinks and left a hearty tip for the proprietor before leaving. "Where to next?" Ron asked as we headed out the door. Ginny and I both looked at one another.

"We're going to do a little sweets shopping at Honeyduke's." Ginny replied quickly and dragged me with her. I laughed as we reached the door. "Okay, now spill." She demanded after her eyes started perusing the fudge and candies.

"Spill what?" I asked innocently.

"Don't. You've been acting strange since the second day of school and all of a sudden Snape and you have this tension between you. I thought you two were on good terms after you saved his life?" Her light brown eyes fell on me. I looked over at the shelves, not exactly seeing them, just contemplating. Ginny was my best friend…

"So…don't freak okay?" I glanced at her. She nodded. "After helping Severus and making sure he would recover, I developed feelings for him." Her eyes popped so I hurried so she wouldn't interrupt. "We kept in contact even after he was released until about six months ago. Then he just kind of dropped off the face of the earth. I tried to forget things, thinking that he would never feel anything besides gratitude, but my thoughts lingered until I just had to face it: I might have fallen in love with him. Then, that first night back, I got so frustrated and my hormones were all crazy, and I kissed him." Ginny looked like she was about to faint. "There is one more thing that happened…." I kept going. Ginny stopped in front of me and waited for the rest. "The next morning, he sent an owl to me asking me to come see him in the dungeon. He wanted to talk. So I went. We did a fair amount of snogging before he told me that nothing could happen and that he had nothing to offer me besides misery. I tried to reason with him but he wouldn't hear it. I haven't talked to him since. Being near him is painful." My voice had quieted by the end and I couldn't look anywhere but at my TOMS. There were several minutes of silence until I felt her hand land and squeeze my shoulder.

"He loves you Hermione. Anyone who has seen him look at you the way he does and knows you can see that. It might take him a while to see it, but he does love you." Her understanding astounded me. "And honestly, he's the only man I know who could keep up with you mentally." I laughed with her.

"That's what Harry said." Her arm looped into mine.

"We'll get you through this Hermione." We moved on to lighter topics after that and picked our favorite candies as well as picking up bags for Harry and Ron. We were on our way to meet the boys when we passed Gladrags Wizard Apparel. "Let's stop in." Ginny read my mind and steered us in. Scouring the racks didn't take long and just when we were headed out the door, I saw a dark black cloak that looked soft as flannel with a velvet collar. I reached out and felt the material, immediately thinking how good it would look around Severus's broad shoulders. The price was close to astronomical, but something just kept eating at me. I couldn't explain my actions but I purchased the cloak and asked the teller to gift wrap it for me. Ginny smiled unabashed but kept silent. The boys met us as we were exiting and thanked us profusely for their candy before gobbling it all down. Spending the rest of the day doing nothing particular felt relaxing. It ended far too quickly. By the time we were back in the common room, we were all beat.

"Good night guys." I feigned comfort on the couch and waited until everyone was up the stairs before I hopped out of the portrait again and ran to the owlery. Luck was again on my side because I ran into no one on the way there or back. I picked out a large owl and scribbled down on a piece of parchment.

Severus,

I couldn't look at it and not think of you. I hope it keeps you warm.

The owl protested slightly at the weight of the package but left swiftly. I went to sleep easily that night, my mind at ease for the first time in two months. In the morning, I was ravished and decided to head to breakfast early. I arrived when practically no one was there and was happy to have the choice of the fruit and bagels that were being offered. A Daily Prophet was lying at a spot not too far down and I snagged it so I could catch up on the news. Sadly, there was nothing of interest. The minister had made a speech over the Azkaban weaknesses they were finding but other than that, it wasn't really worth reading anymore. Just as I was putting it down, Severus coming to the staff table caught the corner of my eye. Not being able to help it, I turned to fully look at him and was more pleased than I should have been to see him smile at me while he sat. I shook my head and finished my food silently, thinking about my potions test. Upon leaving, I ran into Harry and Ron who were still looking groggy outside of the great hall.

"Morning." Ron grumbled. He wasn't a morning person. Harry's expression was livelier and when I saw the fresh hickey on his neck I knew why. I rolled my eyes.

"Classy." I pointed. "You two need to make a rule about never going above the collar bone. McGonagall is going to shoot you. And Snape, well, that's going to be fun. Wish I were still in your class just for the day." Harry's sheepish grin was endearing and he moved his collar up further, trying to hide the mark. "I'll see you guys at lunch." I said and waved goodbye to them.

"See you later." Harry said, still fidgeting. I went to the dungeon with a smile still on my face. Advanced potions class was my smallest by far. Seven boys and three girls, not including me. Almost everyone was there when I arrived and I set my bag on the top of my table. Before I could take out my supplies, a tap on my shoulder made me turn.

"So, mudblood, are you planning on standing in my way the entire class?" Malfoy's ferret-like face was inches from mine. His green eyes sparkled as he waited for my reaction.

"Well, since this is _my_ desk, Draco, I'm not in your way at all." I said haughtily. Again I tried to take out my materials for class but was interrupted when Draco's arms wound themselves around my waist and began to pull me away.

"Move out of my way mud—," I elbowed him in the gut hard.

"Draco, the war is over. You and your families reign ended with it. Your father is locked up in Azkaban for his heinous crimes and cannot come to save you. There is no place for your rudeness anymore. So I suggest you either move on with the times or you can roll over and die with your obsolete insults. Whichever you choose, I don't care. Hear this though, you call me mudblood one more time and I'll hex you so bad, you won't be able to sustain an erection much less copulate. Do I make myself clear?" He opened his mouth to say something snarky. "And if you don't think I'll do it, I dare you to test me now." Draco's color drained from his face while the boys in my class shifted awkwardly at my threat. He said nothing more as he moved to a desk in the back.

"Well, now that the short theater is over, let's get to work on your exams." We all jumped at Severus' voice that came from the dark corner by his desk. None of us had seen him there. He passed out his instructions and I set to work immediately. I took the full two hours to perfect my potion, guaranteeing that I had everything right. Malfoy and I were the last ones to approach Snape with our bottled concoction. "Thank you." I went to leave. "One moment please. Let's clear the air here. Now, Miss Granger, though I agree with the first half of your statement from earlier, let me make it clear that threats will not be excused at this school. It is unnecessary." His attention moved to Draco. "As for you Draco, you had better bury your prejudices now because I tell you this, even though your blood is purer that Miss Granger's, which does not mean that she cannot outdo you in anything and everything. I put my life on her ability to fulfill that threat, and you won't be able to do anything about it." Malfoy was too stunned to reply. His godfather had never put him in his place before. Shocked into silence, I watched Draco leave before turning to Severus. He had a resigned, almost pleased look on his face.


	2. Chapter 2

"Sometimes it infuriates me that you are the only person who can knock me speechless." I breathed. He allowed himself a grin.

"Really?" He began chuckling. "I revel in the moments when you cannot say a word. It means that I am doing my job right." He straightened in his seat. "Thank you for the spectacular gift. I do not deserve such kindness from you." My brows furrowed.

"I know that you mean your gratitude, but it angers me to no end hearing you say that last bit." I grabbed my bag and went to the door. "You deserve everything you want Severus. That and more. You deserve happiness for all you've done for the world. I wish you would allow yourself that."

"You say that because you think you'd make me happy." He replied quietly, as if he were telling himself that.

"No. I tell you that because I wholeheartedly believe it. If not being with me made you happy, I'd still say it. However, you already admitted that you had feelings for me and only resisted them because of your view on self-worth. You could make me very happy Severus. And I feel that I could make you equally as such. You won't let that happen though, will you?" He just breathed and I left with no reply.

The common room was nearly empty when I arrived, save for Ginny, Ron, Harry, and Neville. I plopped down on the window seat next to Neville and pushed my personal problems out of my mind for the time being.

"How was your exam?" Ginny asked while she finished up a roll of parchment for Transfiguration.

"Easy." I replied. I had no energy to triple check my homework before my next class.

"Cho said you lit into Malfoy really well." Ron said while he popped a lemon drop into his mouth. I smiled before closing my eyes. "Though threatening his manhood was a bit mean."

"Guarantee he won't call me mudblood ever again though." I justified, getting a grunt of approval from Ginny. "Snape even laid into him after class. Told him to bury his prejudice nature."

"Well what's gotten into him?" Neville asked before standing to leave. "Hopefully his good mood will stay intact for my class. Wish me luck." Ron got up as well with a huff, most likely dreading the class without me to help him.

"I wouldn't say 'gotten _into_ him'. More like what's gotten _on_ him." Ginny muttered scandalously. I hit her shoulder playfully. "I'm just saying, you spent quite a bit on that cloak, he'd better be in a good mood."

"That's not what you were insinuating and you know it." Harry groaned. "I even knew what you were hinting and I'm thick in that area." Both Ginny and I glanced at one another and burst into laughter. "You two need to get your head out of the gutter." We reigned in our laughter and I pulled my energy together so I could go over my charms homework. Ginny and Harry left before too long and I was left on my own to wait another hour before Charms. Not having the distractions of friends or homework, I replayed the events of this morning in my head.

Severus had changed since the war; there was no doubt about that. He dressed in colors other than black, he smiled more, and he had yet to take house points this year. His moods weren't so bipolar either. If he could change all that, then why couldn't his views on himself change? I spun round and round in my head on these thoughts, thinking that there could be a solution. These considerations lasted me all day, impeding on my tasks. At lunch, Ginny finally broke into my head.

"You have that lost look in your eyes. What are you thinking about?" Harry and Ron were already on the Quidditch field so it was just us girls today. I blushed and looked up at the staff table to Severus. He was talking to Flitwick and couldn't notice my stare, however brief it was. "What about him?" I set forth to explain the events in class and the resulting thoughts that I now seemed momentarily obsessed on.

"How can I help him Ginny?" I asked lastly, knowing she didn't have the answer any more than I did.

"You cannot save someone who doesn't want to be saved Hermione. This isn't like your S.P.E.W. campaign. Snape has to want to be helped. I love your self-righteous nature. I have always admired that you are hell-bent on saving the world. But he will never accept that he deserves more in life. Once you saved him, I believe that he thought you had given him the only kindness that he'd ever receive. And I'd put money on it that he felt and still feels like he didn't deserve that kindness from you." I blinked at Ginny for longer than courtesy allowed, in shock that she had had the insight to see that. "You cannot save the entire world, Hermione." She smiled sadly at me, knowing that that didn't help me. We ate the rest of lunch in a comfortable silence before she went to class and I went to the library.

I was still lost in thought when I ran head long into someone's chest and hit the floor. "Hermione, are you okay?" I glanced up at Severus, surprised.

"I'm fine." I said, taking the hand that he offered. "I'm sorry, sir, I didn't mean to hit you." I apologized while brushing my robes off.

"Well maybe you should take Miss Weasley's advice and stop trying to save me and the world." My eyes popped wide at him, stunned. "Occlumency is a useful tool." He explained.

"You and Harry need to stay out of my head." I growled. Snape's eyes widened.

"What all has Potter heard in your head?" He almost snarled. The all too familiar sneer was back on his lips.

"Everything." I answered through my teeth. His discomfort was obvious. "Harry is my best friend. He isn't about to tell anyone anything."

"Potter does not have the best track—," I held up my hand.

"Harry will not say anything Severus. If anything, Harry just hopes I make your life hell for breaking my heart." My tone was icy, taking him back a bit. "Your mind can be at ease that no one on my end will say a word. Your mistake in emotion will be between the two of us." I pushed past him and went on my way. My last words rang in my head while I walked down the aisles for books. The rest of my day was uneventful and spent keeping myself from confronting Snape. I thought of twenty different scenarios of what I would say to him, each one ending with us in bed. My mind would not get off it. After that, Snape and I went on as if nothing had happened. At least in public. Any time we were alone, both of us seemed to relax formalities and talk or at least smile. My dreams were restless and ten out of ten times they left me awake, breathless, and needy. During these sleepless times, I would study or read. Though after a few weeks of that, I ran out of things to read and I was so far ahead of studying I ended up getting bored in class. Defeating the purpose of keeping my mind off of Severus.

Ginny, being the simple and practical woman she was, finally suggested something late one night while we were all in the common room. "Why don't you write your dreams down after you've had them? That way you might feel better getting them on paper and out of your head." Ginny knew full well what my dreams contained and I was glad that she was helping me keep Ron out of the loop. Despite the fact that we were friends and he was with Lavender, he still got a little annoyed when I mentioned other boys. I wasn't about to have that conversation with him. Not when I already had so much going on. Finally Christmas break came and I was looking forward to the alone time I would get. I had declined the usual invitation to the burrow this year in favor for three weeks free of putting on appearances. All by myself. The thought made me smile.

The morning before they left we sat in the great hall, exchanging their gifts from me and their gifts to me. Ron got me a new set of quills, a cloak with fur from Harry, and Ginny handed me a beautifully bound leather journal. In return Ron got a pair of quidditch gloves, Harry got quidditch goggles and Ginny received a new outfit from me.

"Mum will send her gift to you Christmas day probably." Ron said as he packed up his and Lavender's stuff. Ginny rolled her eyes as he was having trouble with his girlfriend's baggage.

"I'm either going to squeeze her head until it pops off or I'm going to kill Ron with a quidditch club for bringing her." Ginny whispered to me as I walked them to the doors with my gifts in my hand. I giggled at her and squeezed her arm for moral support. I was one hundred percent excited that I had declined my invitation.

"Have a Happy Christmas." I called to them as they walked away. After dropping off my things at the common room I went to the library to pick up the stack of books Madame Pince had said she'd leave for me over the break. I sighed delightedly at the large bound books that rivaled the size of a dresser and couldn't help but smile as I imagined lying in my bed and reading undisturbed.

"What are you doing here, Hermione?" I heard Severus' deep, even voice.

"Picking up books, Severus." I replied as I raised my brow to him, puzzled at the self-explanatory situation.

"I meant, what are you doing still in the castle. The express will be leaving soon."

"I won't be leaving for the holidays Severus. I decided to stay here for the break." I smiled and used a charm to levitate the books. "Shouldn't you be leaving though?" The Order was supposed to be having a meeting this afternoon and Severus was a prominent member.

"Minerva and I spoke and she said that nothing pertaining to me would be said so I excused myself from it." He said as he eyed me. I tried not to blush at his scrutiny but then remembered something.

"Well since you aren't leaving, will you come to the Gryffindor common room with me? I have your Christmas gift and I'd like to give it to you now before I go into a book comatose and shut the world out." I waited, hopeful that he would assent.

"You needn't have gotten me something. You already gave me the cloak." He pursed his lips. I couldn't help but smile at that, thinking of how that expression used to be such normality. When I didn't make a comment, he started on another, less credible route. "What about the other Gryffindor's staying this break? Won't they be a little perturbed seeing me in their space? I would hate to ruin their break by appearing."

"I'm the only one from my house staying." I answered and began walking, pleased that he was following. We didn't speak the rest of the way there. His look was one of great thought, as if he were pondering something meaningful so I left him to think and concentrated on not dropping the books. We arrived and I said the password, leading the way in while the Fat Lady crooned at Severus with big eyes. "I'll be right back." I said and ran upstairs with the books still floating in front of me. Once I had dropped them on my bed, I reached under it to retrieve the Slytherin green present. I had wrapped it during the late night after one of my many erotic dreams while Lavender and Pavarti slept. As I bounded down to the room, Snape smirked at the wrapping in my hands. "Don't get your head all big over the bloody wrapping. It gets thrown away anyways." I said as I handed it to him.

"May I open it now?" He asked as he shook it a little, hoping to get an idea of what it might be.

"Nope. You may open it at any time as long as I am not around. It defeats the purpose of a surprise Christmas gift." I said cheerfully. He gave me a mischievous look and I blocked my thoughts before he could get a peek at them. He frowned a little after a moment.

"Very well. You must have learned Occlumency in the last year or so." He said as he tried to move away. When he couldn't, he looked at me for explanation. I went to shrug, just as confused as he, when I remembered to look up. Sure enough, hanging not four feet from me was a bushel of magical mistletoe, making me realize that I too would not be able to move until we had followed the normal tradition. I couldn't help but laugh when I saw him look up and gulp. "Oh, Flitwick will get hell for this."

"Don't act like we haven't kissed before, Severus." I teased. He glanced down at me then back up again, as if contemplating another way out. My heart drooped a little. Would it really be so bad to kiss me now? Had he finally gotten rid of his small interest in me? The thought made me want to cry but I held it in, knowing that the minute I could move, I'd run back upstairs and pour my heart out right onto the sheets. He finally came to look at me again before bending down to meet my face. His lips were soft, like always, and I tried to hold myself back so he could just peck my lips and be done with it. But when his lips started to move slowly over mine, I couldn't help but react by kissing him back. One of his arms came around my waist while he pressed himself against me and I let out the tiniest of moans while my arms wrapped around his neck. He was the first to pull back, but he only moved his lips away, resting his forehead with mine. I rubbed my nose along his and kissed his lips momentarily while he was still close. He smiled.

"I didn't think I would get to do that again." He murmured.

"I'm not the one holding you back. My feelings haven't changed. They may be buried, but that was because you asked me to." I said, tightening my grip on his neck and skimming his lips with mine again. He pushed against me a little harder, his eyes watching as mine closed at the wonderful sensation. "You're going to stop, aren't you?" I asked with my eyes still closed. He kissed me one last time before stepping out of my arms.

"Thank you for the gifts Hermione. If only I could pay you back for them." He didn't wait for my answer, knowing that what I would have replied with would have been the sassy truth. I sighed; glad that I wouldn't have to cry my sorrows away into my pillow. He still wanted me. I walked up the stairs thoughtfully, wondering what this Christmas would bring. I took off my clothes, bra included, and dressed into short-shorts and a tank top before getting into bed and opening one of the books. I was starting the third tome when my five a.m. alarm went off. Oh Merlin's beard. I begrudgingly shut the book and placed it on my side table as well as stacking the rest up there too. My eyes became so heavy that I waved my wand lazily, shutting all the drapes on the windows and crawled under the covers for some sleep. I was out instantly and didn't dream at all.

_Knock, knock, knock!_

I jumped from my pillow, my head feeling groggy at the sudden noise.

_Knock, knock, knock!_

"I'm coming." I called irritably and waved my wand so the candles lit up around the room. If it was anyone other than McGonagall I was going to string them up to the rafters with their entrails. I hauled open the door and was in utter shock to see Severus standing in front of me with a tray of food and a pitcher of pumpkin juice. "Oh."

"You missed dinner, breakfast, and lunch so I thought I'd bring you sustenance." He explained as he stared at me from head to toe. I looked down at my tank top that was skin tight and was showing my hardened nipples. He could see my legs all the way up until mid-cheek. I wanted to be embarrassed. I really did. However, maybe this would be part of the motivation he needed to touch me. I stepped back and opened the door further.

"Please come in." I offered expectantly. He nodded and strode in swiftly. "Will you be eating with me?" I looked at my clock briefly and held in my exclamation at the time. I had slept almost thirteen hours.

"Would you like me to?"

"Of course." I went over to the table in my room and cleared off the books and robes Lavender had left in her wake.

"Were you sleeping?" He asked as he set the food down. He nodded to my blankets which were strewn to the bottom of the bed.

"Yes. I didn't realize I had been reading all night until my alarm went off at five this morning." I admitted with a smile. It had been awhile since I was able to read a whole night through. His eyebrows rose up into his hairline. "It's been a long time since I've done that." I sat down across from him and watched as he fixed my plate for me, choosing only the best. When he gave me my platter, I couldn't help but smile. "You are too sweet Severus."

"Not at all Miss Granger." He scoffed, his eyebrows knitting together.

"Hermione." I amended. "So you were looking for me at meal times?" I took a bite of the fresh bread. He wouldn't look at me, much less answer. "I had told you that I was going into a book comatose." I pointed out.

"Yes, but your body needs to be fueled. You are already thin enough, the last thing you need to do is skip meals." He scolded. "You should take better care of yourself Hermione." His eyes were harsh as he wiped his mouth with a napkin. I tilted my head to the side and watched him take a sip of his pumpkin juice. The juice made his lips glossy and I resisted the urge to kiss them dry.

"I'll try." I finally replied.

"Don't try. Do. I will not allow you to be malnourished in the name of books."

"But if it gets you to bring me meals then I'll forfeit the ability to get my own food." I giggled and took another bite of my bread. While I listened to him laugh with me, I saw a strawberry on the side of my plate and picked it up to test my boundaries. "So what are you doing for the holidays?" I asked, my ulterior motive being to get his attention before I wrapped my lips over the entire strawberry and taking a seductive bite before sucking the juices off. He didn't answer back at all. His eyes were glued on my lips as if they were in the act of doing what they were simulating. "Severus," I purred. "What are you doing for the holidays?" I repeated.

"Bloody hell, witch." He breathed before he came around the table quickly and kissed me as if nothing in the world was there. I couldn't stop myself from smiling as his hands found their way to my hips, squeezing them roughly before dragging them closer to his waist. Wrapping my legs around him seemed to spur him into action. Severus used his strength to lift me up and spin me until I was on the bed, his body firmly hitting my heated core. "You are pitiless." He breathed against my ear while he rubbed against me. His erection was hard and was promising me one helluva time. "And now I get to repay that cruelty." His lips moved down my throat fiercely, the edge of his teeth skimming across my skin. I groaned in protest, needing him to actually bite me.

"Sevvverrruss…. Don't be afraid to get rough. I won't break." I arched myself up against him forcefully. My breathing was labored, my body hot. His progress down my neck was soon made to my breasts. He sucked my nipple through the material and I cried out loudly.

"Something tells me you're a bit of a screamer." His voice was heavenly as it mixed with our breathing and the scuffling of sheets.

"There's only one way for you to find out." I panted while I pushed my hips to his, rubbing my pelvis against his hard cock. A moan escaped his throat. I took advantage of the distraction and moved my hand between us so I could rub him properly, ensuring his arousal. His length was stifling and my mind marveled at just how deep he was going to get. He bucked against my hand for a few moments before he took it away and pinned it above my head with the other. His tongue circled my hard nipple, the material still in the way while he pressed against me.

"Are you wet?" He asked.

"Yes…oh, yes. Touch me…please." He smiled at my urgency before he dipped his hand down and ran his finger over the wet material. "Aaaahhh….yes…" I moaned out. A coil of heat began in the pit of my stomach. I wrenched my hands away from his grasp and shoved them through his hair, forcing his head down so he could kiss me. While we were lip locked, I started undoing his shirt until I had it off. His body was still as toned as I remembered it, his shoulders still as strong as I recalled.

"If my clothes are coming off, then yours must be off." He stated as he pulled my shirt up and off my body. My breasts were firm and I saw his eyes close before he started suckling and kneading them. My core began to throb. His fingers undid the tie on my shorts and he pulled them off, my knickers following shortly after. "Oh…you are dripping…" he licked his lips before he sunk down to his knees at the edge of the bed and pulled my hips down. I knew immediately what he was about to do and I arched in anticipation. He blew on me and chuckled when I groaned. "Someone is ready." Before I could demand him to do anything, his lips were on my clit. I bit my bottom lip to keep me from screaming in relief. He licked, nibbled, and sucked on my core until my body shattered with an orgasm. After my release I sat up and pulled his lips to mine. He smiled in approval as my lips worked over his and my hands undid his pant buttons and zipper. When they were off, he pushed me back down and spread my thighs wider to accommodate his body. "Hermione, you are going to be very sore by the time I am done with you."

"Promises, promises. I like action, Severus, not just words." He growled at me playfully then pushed the head of his penis to my entrance. "Ooohhh…" My nails scratched his ass as I gripped it to pull him in. He sunk into me and my walls clenched around him like a gel.

"You are so tight…" His mouth was back at my ear causing my abdomen to tighten again. "You like the sound of my voice while I'm in you don't you?"

"Yes…yes…" I murmured while he kept pulling out and sinking back in. "Faster," I said after a moment or two. Severus chuckled but complied, his voice still in my ear, whispering things that blew my mind from sanity. "I'm about to come…." I choked out as my muscles tightened again. This time, when I shattered, he told me to let it out and I moaned his name into the heavy air around us. He thrusted into me through my orgasm, relentlessly, until I felt him release inside of me as well, our gasps of pleasure combining. "Best…Christmas gift…ever." I moaned as he hovered over me. His warm chuckle made me laugh and I pushed him onto his side while still keeping us connected. He drew me into his embrace and ran his fingers through my hair until we caught our breath. "Would it bother you if I asked you to stay all night?" I questioned cautiously. His fingers stopped in my hair before he moved them to my jaw and pulled my face to his.

"Did you think I was planning on leaving you after I had mounted you?" I blushed at his wording and looked away from his eyes. He kissed my temple.

"I didn't know. I was unsure of what your plans were." I said shyly and rested my head closer to his neck, nuzzling him with my nose. I heard a sigh of contentment ease from his lungs.

"I cannot believe you did that with the bloody strawberry." Severus commented after a few moments incredulously. I smirked into his shoulder and let my tongue glide along his collarbone. I felt his abdomen tighten underneath my hand and I nipped where my tongue had once been. "Ah…" His response only made me bite harder, leaving a mark.

"I was surprised I got you to react that way. I was thinking that you were going to keep denying what I was offering." My chin rested on his chest and he resumed brushing through my hair with his fingers.

"You gave me no choice." He said simply. We stayed like that for a while but my hormones were rising in my chest, causing me to become restless. His knowing smile only aroused me further. "Come here." His demand was met with my lips on his, my legs straddling his waist. Severus smiled in approval. "You are so beautiful, you glow almost." I knew I flushed all over because his eyes showed his interest. I bent down and kissed him, my tongue slipping in between his thin lips. While we were welded together he rubbed my back rhythmically, soothing me as well as exciting me all at once. We kept that up until I lost patience. I rocked my hips back roughly until his erection sunk into me. Both of us groaned in bliss.

Hours passed between us in my room, neither of us disconnecting from one another. Even during our few hours of dozing he was in me until one of us woke up and started all over again. At the early hours of the next morning, after being asleep for merely three hours, I woke up to a heated sensation between my legs. His hands were kneading and teasing my breasts tentatively while his lips skimmed over my navel and lower. Without opening my eyes I let my fingers slide through his hair until I had a firm grip on it then pulled him up so I could get my morning kiss. He obeyed, leaving me breathless when he pulled away.

"Good morning." He whispered against my neck.

"Good morning." I smiled and rubbed my knee up his ribs. He closed his eyes at the sensation so I kept at it. After five or so strokes he caught the inside of my knee and bent down to trail kisses along my inner thigh. My lower back arched ever so slightly. His mouth stopped at my hip and my eyes cast downward to meet his.

"I adore watching your body move." He sighed when his hand took the place of his mouth. The pace was slow and torturous and before long I was trembling beneath him. "Tell me what you want." He insisted while his hand moved closer and closer to my clit. I went to answer him when a tapping sound came from the window near Lavender's bed. I froze beneath him, thinking that maybe I was just losing my mind. But then the bird squawked, upset at the delay in the cold, and I moved from underneath Severus to open the window.

"Who would be sending me an owl now?" I pondered out loud. If it's Ginny, I swear I'm going to kill her for interrupting this monumentous event. I opened the letter and let the bird sit on the back of a chair to wait for the reply.

Hermione,

I need your assistance immediately at the ministry. Please make haste as quickly as possible. If you can convince Severus to join you, do so. We need as many people as we can.

Minerva

My mind froze. For McGonagall to send a message to me at four in the morning meant that something was very wrong. I grabbed a quill off of the table and wrote a quick reply off a scratch piece of parchment.

Minerva,

Give me thirty minutes and I will be there straight away.

Hermione

"Get up." I said as I ran to my closet. He raised an eyebrow but didn't move more than that. "Severus, move that delectable ass because you and I are being summoned to the ministry by Minerva." I passed him the note as I reached for a pair of jeans.

"She said 'if' you can convince me. I don't technically have to go." His languid tone made me want to jump him. I went over to him, bending down to where my breasts were just hovering over his chest. I flicked my tongue out and licked along his jaw line before pressing my lips to his. He reached up to pull me down further although I resisted. He grunted in disapproval and tried to glare up at me.

"You will get up, get dressed, and come with me. If not, I will make sure to torture you for the rest of the year." I whispered into his ear before taking the lobe between my teeth. "Get up Severus. I can reward you when we return." My hand inched down his abdomen and was rewarded when his hips rose ever so slightly. "Severus," I breathed against him heavily.

"Fine. But when we return, you will pay severely. Don't expect to be off your back for a good long while." I laughed as he got up and began to dress himself. As we headed to the fire place, I looked back one more time at the bed, longing to be back in it with him in me. "Don't worry, we will be back there again, and you will be want of nothing." My body ached pleasantly at the thought and I turned to kiss him one last time before we stepped in and flooed to the ministry.

Arriving, we were assaulted by flashes from _The Daily Prophet_'s lead reporter, Rita Skeeter. "Miss Granger, Professor Snape, what comments do you have to say about the events?" Neither of us said anything as we pushed past her and followed the trail of people that were whispering and shaking their heads.

"What do you think this is about?" I asked Severus in a hushed undertone.

"I have no idea." He murmured back, his hand pressing against the small of my back as we went through a doorway. I tried to fight my blush away but I knew there was no way around it. "Try and control that flush or else you're going to cause me to have to ravish you right here."

"Hermione! Severus!" Minerva's voice interrupted my reply and I pushed away my hormonal response as she approached us. "Thank heaven's you're both here." She grabbed my forearm and dragged me further into the room, Snape trailing behind amusedly.

"What's all this about Minerva?" I asked. We stopped when we were at the back of the room where the Minister was as well as a few aurors. Lying on the floor was a pile of clothes as well as a green, creamy-like substance. Smoke curled up from the mess. Kingsley, the new minister and a member of the Order, looked at us with a confusion that surprised me. Lord knew he had seen his fair share of the most interesting things. However, his facial expression showed he had never seen anything like this before. I approached the edges of the liquid and crouched down.

"Don't touch it." Severus' voice was cold. I turned back to him.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious." I retorted and went back to studying the mess.

"This was once Lester Crain." Kingsley said as he crouched next to me. "We were discussing how we were going to take care of the new installments at Azkaban. Next thing we know, he's grabbing his throat as if he's choking then his skin starts to bubble and he…melted." The description and the mess before me made me think of _The Wizard of Oz_, and if it weren't for the company we were in and the situation, I might have laughed, asking if he had had a bucket of water thrown on him.

"It smells like sulfur was used in whatever means this happened." I said as I looked back at Severus. I stood. "Did he drink anything?" I asked.

"He had a mug of something in his office just before we were moving to my office." Kingsley replied. I gave a pointed look at Severus and we followed Kingsley. When we approached the door, I took out my wand instinctively. Years of being with Harry and Ron had taught me to constantly be prepared for the worst, especially with our track record in the ministry. Severus pushed me behind him, leaving his hand on my shoulder protectively. I peaked around him to see Kingsley open the door slowly. Immediately we noticed that it had been ransacked. Everything, including the desk, had been turned upside down. "There's no one here." Kingsley said after looking around. Severus then allowed me in, staying close by me though as I began to investigate. I found the mug on the floor, its contents spilled out. I picked it up, about to sniff the rim when Snape took it from me and used his wand to put the fluid back in it.

"We'll take it and study it." Kingsley nodded at Severus.

"But why was I needed here?" I asked as Minerva stood in the doorway. Minerva and Kingsley passed a look between themselves. My brow furrowed.

"This was left in his pocket. It had your name on it." Kingsley handed me a piece of parchment.

"I don't even know Mr. Crain." I was beyond confused now. I glanced up at Severus who had the oddest look on his face. Opening the letter, I found neat handwriting filling the parchment.

Hermione Granger,

You and I have never met and I daresay we never shall. In light though, that's a good thing. A great woman such as you should never be in the company of a man such as me.

Years have passed since the first Great War, and my involvement in it. After it ended, my participation was kept secret. No one knew that I had been a part of Voldemort's army. When the second Great War broke out, I disappeared and hid, not wanting to be drawn into it. Now, even a year after the fall, I have been found and brought into a new danger. This danger, however, is not a part of the aftermath from Voldemort. This evil is of an all knew creation. And it is now seeking out all of those that had once supported the Dark Lord, from both wars. Because of my cowardice to pick a side this last time, it will kill me. I know it, can accept it.

I write to you, and not Mr. Potter, because I know that you have the intelligence to destroy it. It will take actual brain power to find and defeat it. Something Mr. Potter does not possess in abundance such as you. Love and friendship will not save you as it did him. Gain some allies, Miss Granger, but know that the end task will be yours. Be careful and good luck.

Lester Crain


	3. Chapter 3

I stood there, looking at the letter, rereading it several times before handing it to Severus for his inspection. He read it once, twice, and a third time before scowling at me. I took the letter back, handing it to Kingsley and began wondering what to think. "Did he ever mention me?" I asked first. Kingsley scowled but then his eyes twinkled.

"In the last few months, yes. He was constantly asking anyone who had ever met you about you. Even the portrait of Albus. Lester seemed to be obsessed with finding out your intelligence. Everyone who has ever known you vouched that you were the brightest witch of this age." I looked over at Minerva, her mouth opening and closing.

"Yes?" I stepped to Minerva. "What is it?"

"A few weeks ago, Crain asked me to persuade you to stay at Hogwarts. He had heard that I had offered you a teaching position and was adamant that you should take the job and that I should not let you say no. When I had asked him why he was so obstinate about it, he just shook his head and said that I needed to keep you close, said that you were the key to something great, and that soon you'd be in danger." Minerva's voice was too faint. I picked up a chair and set it by her.

"Sit Minerva. You need to rest." She sat gratefully.

"He obviously knew that his end was coming." Kingsley stated. "Question is, what is the danger that he speaks of?"

"That isn't the only question." Severus said. "Why give this to her, not tell someone from the ministry."

"Because as always, there are leaks in the ministry." I replied. "So many people, he didn't know who was on whose side." I looked around at the walls and papers strewn on the floor, curious to find anything that might help me. I heard Severus move around and papers being picked up and examined. No one of us said anything for several hours while we waded through his office, coming up with nothing.

"I'll head over to his manor tonight." Kingsley said quietly, looking around one last time. He shut the door gently.

"I'll come." I volunteered.

"No." Severus said, his voice scaring me slightly. "You obviously are to stay protected. You will go back to Hogwarts. I'll accompany Kingsley."

"I'm not a child. You cannot tell me what to do." I glowered at him. I may be okay with him telling me what to do in bed, but I sure as hell will not take him ordering me around in my day to day life. "If this concerns me, then I should be there to find whatever it is he might have left for me. Lord knows I've been through enough to understand the risks."

"Severus has a point, Hermione." Minerva interjected. "He was persistent about keeping you safe and out of harm's way for as long as possible. It would be foolish not to do as he said."

"How am I supposed to defeat whatever this is if I don't have the evidence to prepare myself?" I snapped back irritated. I turned my heated gaze back to Severus. "I don't understand how you all can read what he left in that letter and expect me to sit by and do nothing about it." By this time we were closer to the hall full of people and we halted on the brink of the entrance. No one needed to hear any of this, especially Rita Skeeter, who waited just outside, her camera ready.

"Do you trust me?" Severus demanded, his dark eyes penetrating me.

"Of course I do!" I said vehemently.

"Then trust me to go look tonight with Kingsley. I will not have you getting hurt." He walked away. I glared at his retreating figure, bile rising in my throat. Oh, that man was going to pay. Suddenly I felt Minerva's soft touch on my upper arm.

"Don't fuss over it Hermione. He wants to keep you safe. Let him." Her calm blue eyes twinkled at me but it didn't lighten the concern I saw in them. "We should get back to the school." We walked arm in arm while I fumed over Severus' nerve. Skeeter didn't hesitate to attack us with pictures and questions, all the while trying to unnerve us with insults. We disregarded her with ease and flooed back to the headmistress's office. "Now, let's have a cup of tea and talk. We haven't done that since you've been back." I smiled, knowing that she was reading my mind.

"Professor, I'd appreciate something a little stronger than tea." I joked. But the smile fell from my face when she brought out a crystal bottle filled with bourbon.

"I think so too." She replied with a smile. She poured us each a generous amount and we sat by the fire in two velvet winged chairs. "Don't be too hard on Severus. I do not think he has cared so much about a woman since Lilly as he does you." I almost choked on the sip I had just taken. She gave me a knowing smile. "When you were in your fifth year, Albus and I sat in this very same place, drinking the same thing, and I remember him saying, 'Minerva, you may find me crazy to say this, but does it ever occur to you that Severus might find himself being just as in love with Miss Granger as he was with Lilly'. And sure enough, I thought him crazy. Then, after you helped him and I saw him kiss your fingertips at St. Mungo's, I knew that the old man was right." She took a long sip of her bourbon before continuing. "You have many qualities that Lilly had. Cunning, smart, kind, and pretty. However, there are certain traits that she didn't possess that I think Severus is more prone to see and gravitate to in you. You are more forgiving than Lilly would have been. You may even be more intelligent than her. And unlike Lilly, you see beyond Severus' outward appearance. In that, I believe, was the main reason that Severus was so keen on you. Though, I didn't think he was prepared for the amount of passion you would throw at him." My eyes snapped to hers. Immediately I had the sense that Minerva was as all knowing as Dumbledore had once been. "Oh, the attraction between the two of you is quite palpable to some of us. Thankfully, only the staff has noticed the effect you have had on him. You have our blessing." Her smile was something else. I settled into the chair more, both embarrassed and agitated. She giggled a little and refilled our glasses.

"Why is it that when I've finally become accustomed to being out of danger, I'm thrusted back in?" I asked after watching the liquid swirl around in my glass.

"I have no idea. I've been asking that myself." She said. "However, you must be important to this cause. We'll get you through this. The letter said you should make allies. And you have one in me, as well as Severus of course. I doubt there isn't a professor here that won't be on your side." I felt a little better hearing that. We moved on to talking about the teaching position and she gave me all the details. I accepted it, realizing that no matter what she had said, I would of course agree to it. Hogwarts was home. I left her after finishing my third glass and went to the dungeons to find Severus before he left, feeling a slight buzz in my system. He was bent over a cauldron, his wide shoulders moving with precision. I walked up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist, resting my forehead between his shoulder blades. He went still, adjusting to being touched. I waited for him to relax before letting go. He turned to stare down at me, still angry over my earlier outburst at the ministry.

"You cannot blame me, Severus, for not wanting to be told what to do." I said calmly.

"No, I can't. But you would think that my word would have meant something to you." He replied dangerously. His back was turned to me before I could say anything.

"Your word does mean something to me. I will never lie to you about that. But you've known me for a long time; you know that I don't take orders well in matters that don't involve the classroom." I smirked. "And maybe when you have me in bed." I felt his body give off a hot wave. He turned to me slowly, his dark eyes glittering. "Severus," I stepped closer to him. "Don't leave mad at me." His still form scared me. When a moment or two passed, he finally softened. His arms were around me and I felt his lips at my neck.

"You understand why I demanded you stay?" Goose bumps rose up on my skin.

"Yes. Of course I do." I pulled back so I could see his face. "Minerva understood why also." I smiled sheepishly.

"Well that woman has always been too well at reading off people." He said before bending down and kissing my lips.

"She says that you love me." I mentioned while his caresses went further down my neck. He froze, his shoulders tensed under my fingertips yet he made no move to respond. I pulled back to see his face freeze. "Do you?" The way his eyes melted while he stared at me gave me my answer. On tiptoe, I pushed my lips to his and kissed him until I saw stars.

"Does that not frighten you?" He asked, breathless.

"Of course not," I replied, kissing him again. "It just means I don't have to be afraid to reciprocate the feeling." His eyes widened before I kissed him again. I smiled at how short a time it took for him to wrap his arms around my waist and pull me to him. My feet were no longer able to touch the floor as his hands kept me pressed to him while we kissed each other senseless. "I love you," I murmured when we had rested our heads against one another, no air left in our lungs.

"Again." He demanded softly.

"I love you Severus." I submitted sweetly. We resumed our lip-locked duel until someone cleared their throat from the door. I parted from him half-heartedly to see Minerva, her grin stretching from ear to ear.

"I'm really very sorry to interrupt, but Kingsley just rang my fireplace. He's ready." She left us alone to say our goodbyes.

"Be careful." I mumbled, trying to force my fingers to let go of his arms. I wasn't succeeding very well. He kissed me again, his tongue running over my bottom lip. I had to resist the urge to delve deeper in, knowing that I was already delaying him.

"Will you stay in my chambers tonight?" His baritone voice made me ache. "I want to hold you when I get back." My heart fluttered.

"Of course," I pressed another urgent kiss to him. He lingered only somewhat then was gone. I fought back the urge to let my emotions make me think the worse. Sadly, with my previous years at Hogwarts, the worst was what I usually encountered. To keep myself busy, I worked on dissecting the substance from Crain's cup. When I had most of it separated, and could do no more, I but a statious charm on it and went to Severus' rooms. I found a neat and tidy bedroom with a large four-postured bed, two leather chairs by the roaring fireplace, and three full walls of nothing but books from floor to ceiling. Giddiness overwhelmed me as I perused every title on all three walls at least twice, impressed on how much muggle literature he possessed. I decided on _Pride and Prejudice_ after my third trip around. My next thought was to curl up in one of his chairs by the fire, but after looking at the large bed before me, I knew I had no choice. Undressing into nothing but my tank top and panties, I crawled underneath the covers and began to read. I got as far as Elizabeth being in Lady Catherine's dining room before I nodded off.

"Hermione," Severus' smooth voice roused me. He was moving the book from my chest as I opened my eyes. I smiled sleepily and reached for him.

"Welcome home," I greeted him when he fitted himself in my arms.

"You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say that." I opened my legs and wrapped them around his hard body, loving how warm he was against me. I kissed his lips tenderly, still a little sleepy.

"Probably about as happy as it makes me to say it." His chuckle reverberated into my own chest. He met my lips with slow, enticing strokes, paying close attention to my moans. "Severus," I breathed as he moved down my collarbone. "Take your clothes off."

"Miss Granger, what _are_ your intentions?" He mocked as he did exactly as I said.

"A little late to ask my intentions considering you had no problem with your own intentions up in my bed." I retorted, undressing myself and heading to his bathroom, letting his eyes roam my backside.

"Where are you going?" He growled sexily. I brought out a bottle of his lotion, waving it in the air.

"Lay down on your stomach."

"You've gotten quite bossy." I pushed him playfully onto the bed. "You had better watch that sass, darling, otherwise you might find yourself getting some sass back, tenfold." My body fluttered at the threat. I straddled his hips and worked a glob of lotion in my hands to warm it before applying it to his back. When my hands worked with pressure on his muscles, I smiled when he groaned in relief. I massaged his neck, shoulders, and back, dismissing his tense muscles into smooth lines. Leaning down, I nipped the skin along his shoulder blades then kissed away the small sting. He turned his body beneath my thighs so he could face me. My eyes closed when his hand came up and caressed me from my cheek to the apex of my thigh. My hips began to rock back and forth leisurely, my abdomen tightening. We took our time all night. Neither of us was in a hurry while we memorized each other completely. Around six in the morning we rested next to one another, our hands still trailing over each other.

"You are perfect…" I whispered drowsily. My fingertips were making slow, deliberate circles across his chest. He caught my hand in his and brought my wrist up for him to kiss.

"Only for you, Miss Granger, only for you." I met his eyes. We laid there together for quite some time, his fingers threading through my hair while my index finger brushed a trail from his chest down to his navel. "May I ask a personal question?" He adjusted himself so he could see my face.

"I think that you are allowed that now." I smirked.

"Who was the first?" His black eyes scrutinized my face carefully while I blushed.

"Krum was. It was over the summer after fourth year. We met up in London to catch up and all, but before I knew it, we were on a train and I was cold." I said, watching as he pondered this.

"In a train cart…who would have thought that the pristine Miss Granger would do such a thing? Any after that?" I tilted my head up at him, curious as to why he wanted to know.

"Harry, once." His eyebrows rose, surprised. "It was in our fifth year. Honestly, it was nothing but a pity shag. I was sore over Ron being with Lavender and he was mad over Ginny being with Dean. Neither of us made a big deal about it. It didn't affect our friendship at all. Then Ron and I did it once before we realized that we were not suited for one another. And that's it." I looked up at him again. "Why?"

"I was simply curious as to who had been my predecessors. Whether I had anything to worry about. Do I?" He watched my facial expressions carefully.

"No, Severus, you have nothing to worry about. None of them even gave me an orgasm." I comforted him. He didn't show it, but I could tell that he was pleased. "What about you? Am I allowed the same courtesy?" Not knowing hadn't bothered me until he had asked me first and now I really wanted to know if there had been a past lover that I might be compared to. I know nothing happened physically between him and Lilly, but I wasn't sure if any woman had followed after her death. Judging by his _abilities_, he had to have learned them from somewhere.

"No one of importance, darling." He said softly. I caught his eyes and held them, hoping he'd elaborate. He sighed. "As a Death Eater, I was…given special privileges with other members. There was nothing beyond sex, no relationships or affairs." My stomach flopped around a little, unsettled by the knowledge, more so than I cared to share. I rested my chin on his chest and thought about it.

"Do I know any of these women?" Narcissa Malfoy and Bellatrix Lestrange were the only two I knew, and Narcissa wasn't an actual Death Eater, just married to one. When he hesitated, I purposely held myself still from backing away. "Please…" I said.

"Both Narcissa and Bellatrix." He looked away from me with disgrace. I let my head rest on his chest and went back to stroking the small patch of hair there. "It was a very long time ago. None of it meant anything. It was simply a need that was necessary to be taken care of." I knew that he was upset for telling me. I pushed past my unease over his confession. He was mine now. I knew that I meant something to him. Using my index finger, I pulled his face back to mine and I kissed him deeply.

"It changes nothing Severus. I love you." I kissed him again until I felt him kiss back.

"I love you so much." He murmured as he held me by my waist. "Now sleep. We both need our rest." I smiled contentedly and did as he said. I awoke to an empty bed around noon. In fact, the entire dungeon was empty. After I dressed I tried to seek him out. On my way to the library, I ran into Minerva.

"Hermione, there you are. Severus asked me to give you this," she handed me a note hurriedly, then left. I thanked her and went the opposite direction to my rooms.

My love,

I'm sorry for my departure. I didn't want to wake you when you so desperately needed the sleep. I will be gone most of the day today. I do not plan to return until very late tonight. You are welcome to stay in my chambers again as well as entertain yourself with anything in them. As for what happened last night, which I was very surprised you did not ask about, neither Kingsley nor I found anything. Crain's house had been left in a similar state as his office. I implore you to please stay in the castle. I love you.

Severus

I read it four times over, interested as to where he was. I took a long shower, my mind concentrating on the last three days, slowly trying to fight through a fog of fear, love, and uncertainty. With little to do otherwise, I went down to Severus' chambers, stripped and fell asleep in his bed, exhausted beyond measure both mentally and emotionally. A soft knock at the door woke me. I went, dressing as I walked, and opened it, groggy. Minerva stood there with a blush on her cheeks.

"I thought I might find you here. Severus asked for me to make sure you ate. He didn't want you skipping meals while waiting for him." I smiled sheepishly and nodded. She pulled me through the door and we walked silently to the Great Hall. Sitting at the table with the teachers, I felt my peers stare at me. "You might as well start sitting up here. You'll be working here in just a few weeks." Minerva whispered to me, seeing my unease. I nodded my head, then caught the last sentence. I moved to ask her what she meant about 'a few weeks' but she had already moved on to talk to Madame Pomfrey. I filed my question away and began putting food in my mouth, not really tasting it. Hagrid waved to me from the other side of the table and I waved back, trying to seem happier than what I was. I couldn't prevent my mind from worrying about Severus and Crain's warning of danger. What on earth could be as bad as Voldemort? What kind of danger could be worse than the Dark Lord? I mulled over the possible answers the entire dinner until Professor Flitwick caught me on the way out.

"Miss Granger, I wanted to talk to you for a moment." I stopped and smiled at the small man. "Because of my health problems, I was wondering, in the spring, would you mind taking the position over? I just don't have it in me to stay here any longer." My heart broke for him but this confirmed what Minerva had said. "I was hoping you would just allow me to replace your Charms class for mentoring purposes?"

"Of course, Professor." I replied sweetly. He nodded his head enthusiastically and I left him there after agreeing to make my mentoring time in the afternoon. I returned to Severus' bed and fell asleep almost instantly. Nightmares plagued my sleep but they wouldn't force me to wake up.

"Darling," I opened my eyes to bright light streaming in from the open curtains and Severus looking down at me. "Good morning." He kissed my lips softly.

"Morning. What time is it?" I asked, stretching myself against him.

"It's almost noon." He answered sweetly. "You didn't feel me get into bed this morning, did you?" I shook my head. "My, my, you must have been very tired." He kissed my lips, my cheeks, and made his way down my neck. "Why were you so tired?"

"Just a lot on my mind. Where were you?" My arms weaved themselves possessively around his neck until he was centimeters from my face. He chuckled.

"Kingsley and I were going over the ministry with a fine comb, trying to figure out what happened yesterday." His long fingers traced around my collarbone absentmindedly, giving my skin chills. "We went through so many bloody offices and files, my head was spinning. We came up with nothing honestly. Kingsley is nervous. He thinks there will be more deaths."

"Did you know that Crain was a Death Eater?" I looked up at him.

"He was a low level. I knew that he pledged to the Dark Lord, but he hadn't been trusted with much. He was an expendable." I nodded. That would be the only reason he went unnoticed. "I am curious as to how this danger came to him, when he was so low on the totem pole, yet some of us higher powered ones are still alive." Immediately I tensed. I had not thought of that angle. Severus had been one of Voldemort's right hands. He would have a bounty on his head. "Hermione," his hands rubbed my ribs, trying to relax me. "You have nothing to worry about."

"You don't know that Severus. You cannot predict what you don't know." I said as panic took over. I sat up. "If you are going to force me to stay here and be protected then I expect that from you."

"Absolutely not." He said firmly, as if that would be the end.

"Severus, I'm serious."

"You cannot demand that of me Hermione." His murky eyes were intense, his voice even worse. Disbelief slapped my senses. "I will not be confined. I was put through enough of that as a spy." He sat back against the pillows.

"But you can demand that of me?" I stood up from the bed and began putting on my sweater and jeans. "I think not, Severus."

"Where are you going?" The fact that he was surprised pissed me off.

"Severus, if for one moment you thought that you were going to dictate everything in this relationship, me included, than you have gone stark raving mad. I understood why you wanted me protected. You care for me. But I am asking you to do the same thing and now it's unreasonable?" He couldn't speak. "You will not require anything from me again Severus. Apparently, this was foolish to attempt something between the two of us." I walked out then, my anger and pain mixing. Upon entering my room I locked the door and proceeded to throw everything I could get my hands on. I broke countless things but I didn't care. Tears fell down my cheeks until I couldn't see straight and just fell onto my bed.

I refused to see anyone the rest of the winter break, Christmas included. I received my usual knitted sweater from Mrs. Weasley as well as a long letter expressing her reluctance that I hadn't come to the Burrow and wishing me well. Severus came to my door multiple times, even tried to break in, but I had warded it off too well and he left, swearing. Minerva tried as well but I couldn't let her see me like this. The night before everyone returned I cleaned up the room and used a quick spell to put everything back together that had been broken. At around eleven at night, I decided to take a walk outside in the snow. Though my common sense screamed at me, I left my nightgown on and wrapped myself in my cloak. The fresh air made me feel a little better. While I was by the frozen lake, I felt someone's presence. I turned to see Minerva watching me a few yards away. She smiled sadly before heading my way.

"It is a very pretty night." Her calm, even voice relaxed me a little. I nodded my head. We took a seat at one of the many boulders on the edge. "You have me worried. Especially since you are out here with bare feet and only your nightgown on under your cloak." Her eyes regarded me cautiously before she let her hand grasp mine.

"I'm sorry. I just didn't want to see anyone while I was so…broken. Still don't." I replied in a whisper.

"Severus is miserable."

"That's his fault." I retorted, not sorry for anything. "His world of double standards isn't going to work if he wants a relationship."

"Hermione, he is a man who is not used to having someone care for him."

"So that excuses him from being under the same restrictions he wants of me?" I arched an eyebrow and pursed my lips. She opened her mouth then shut it again. "I love him Minerva. I've loved him for a very long time. I was infatuated with him as a young girl. But that doesn't change the situation. It's a two way street. If he expects me to swallow his demands, then him doing the same for me should not be that difficult. I don't demand much. Just that he stays safe." I saw her nod her head from the corner of my eye.

"You should go talk to him." Her blue eyes fell on my face. I respected Minerva more than anyone in the world. She had always been my inspiration for life, much like a mother figure. Therefore, her advice was always adhered to.

"Fine." I conceded. I knew he would still be up, even at this hour, so I stood and put my hand on her shoulder. "Thank you Minerva. Your words mean so much." She smiled at me, staying put to look at the lake. I left her there on the rock and summoned up all my Gryffindor courage as I made my way in the castle to the dungeons. Sure enough, Severus was in his office, at his desk, a tumbler of scotch in his hand. He was staring off into the fireplace deep in thought. He didn't even hear me approach him from behind and when my hands touched his shoulders and slid down his chest until my lips were at his ear, he jumped. I rested my chin on his shoulder, taking in the peppermint and herb essence. "What are you thinking?" I asked.

"How my life seems to be a variation of extremes, never even." He rested his head back against my shoulder.

"I understand." My lips touched his throat briefly. "I'm sorry." I hadn't expected to apologize to him. However, being near him, knowing that I had already almost lost my chance with him once, made me think that we could work through this. He pulled my right hand so that way I would move to face him. I sat reflexively on his lap and our eyes met. He placed his tumbler on his desk and wrapped his arms around my waist.

"You have nothing to apologize for. I shouldn't have been so stubborn."

"Is the world coming to an end? Did Severus Tobias Snape just apologize?" I mocked. He smiled a little while his thumb rubbed back and forth against my waistline.

"I shouldn't have been so surprised that you would want me just as safe as I wanted you. I'm not used to people caring for me." I bent down to him for a sweet kiss, hoping to convey just how much I did care. "I've never been good with compromise Hermione." He said against my neck.

"I know. I should have stayed and talked rather than leaving. I was so angry." I let my fingers slide up onto the nape of his neck and rested them there.

"I am well aware of how livid you were. I've felt it immensely these last few days." He dragged his lips up to mine, pressing lightly into me. "Though, I must ask a favor of you." I raised an eyebrow. "Even when you are mad at me, even if you cannot stand to see me anymore, as I expect you will feel someday, don't stop taking care of yourself, please?" His hand pressed on my stomach with emphasis. "You need to eat _and_ sleep." I watched his dark eyes flit to the clock pointedly. I smiled impishly. "Why are you walking around this castle barefooted?" He asked, his tone becoming serious. I shrugged my shoulders and curled myself up into his arms.

"May I stay with you?"

"As much as I would love that, both of us need sleep for tomorrow now that we have settled things, and if you were to come to my bed, neither of us would find sleep." I blushed at his words, not able to stop my body from reacting with an aching heat. We kissed softly for a moment or two. "I do not deserve you. You are too perfect." He murmured. I shook my head.

"Severus, you deserve so much. So much more than what I can give you." He went to protest but I stopped him with my lips. "I am flawed in many ways love; however, if you are as happy to have me in your life as I am to have you in mine, then nothing more needs to be said about what we deserve. Understand?" His returning smile was heart melting. "I love you."

"And I you." I stood up from his lap and bent down to kiss his forehead. "Sleep well darling."

"You too." I squeezed the hand that was clasped in mine and left, feeling lighthearted. My mind then began thinking about what our life would consist of now that we had that figured out. We hadn't done much talking on the subject honestly, and with the impending doom that Crain had mentioned made things further complicated. We had time for that later though. I went to sleep with ease and slept soundly. No dreams, thank Merlin.

"Ron! It's supposed to go there." Lavender's shrill voice woke me in the morning. I kept my eyes shut, not wanting to see Ron in our room. I heard some fumbling and then a small giggle. "Oh, Ron," the sound of them snogging made me want to gag.

"Looks like Hermione received a gift last night." My interest peeked. "I wonder who it's from." Ron's voice was annoying this early.

"Don't open it. The last time I opened a piece of her mail without asking she almost hexed my hand off." Lavender's warning made me smile. It was true, of course. "I'll just put it by her books. She'll see it when she gets up for breakfast. Now let's go. I'm starving." The door shut and I opened my eyes to see a red giftwrapped package with a gold ribbon tied around it. I knew who it was from before I even touched it. I opened the piece of parchment attached first.

My dearest,

I hate that our first Christmas together could not be spent in each other's presence. However, being the circumstances, I will have to get over it. Here is your gift. I was hoping to give it to you face-to-face, as you were allowed to do for me, but since I did send you to bed, I put it under your door reluctantly. I hope you enjoy.

As for your gift to me, I cannot tell you how shocked I was to open it. For you to find such a rare book, after I have been searching for it for so long, needless to say I am impressed. You'll have to tell me how you found such a singular manuscript. I believe it is the most precious gift I have ever received. Thank you. I love you and I hope you slept well. I await seeing you at the staff table for breakfast.

Severus

Remembering his request last night, I rolled out of bed and spent thirty minutes showering and changing into a skirt, heels, and an emerald green silk top that would for sure torture him with its ability to show just enough cleavage. I pinned my hair up loosely and let my curls frame my face. I opened the gift then, shrieking as I saw the beautiful leather bound journal that screamed expensive. On the cover, etched in pure gold, was my favorite quote from _Persuasion_ by Jane Austen. "You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you." Tears sprang to my eyes. I had only read the book in front of him once; when I was in my third year. He had asked me why I was tearing up in the library, his usual sneer not scaring me for once. I had repeated the quote to him, explaining that to me, this quote was the epitome of love. When I emerged into the Great Hall, I couldn't keep a smile off of my face. Ron, Harry, Ginny, and Neville all stared at me as if I were strutting down the way in absolutely nothing. Lavender just observed at me as if I were scum. Of course, with Ron ogling me the way he was, I couldn't blame her.

"Hey guys. Welcome back." I hugged each of them, not sitting.

"Hermione, you look gorgeous." Ginny said, her eyes conveying that she knew something was up and was expecting to be filled in later. "I missed you. The break seemed so long without you." Her piercing look to Lavender conveyed everything.

"It's great to see you Hermione." Harry hugged me and kissed my cheek softly. "How was your holiday?"

"It was fantastic. How about you?" He shrugged and glanced at Ron and Lavender. Neither of them greeted me but I didn't take offense. Something told me that the break had not been as pleasant as either of them had anticipated.

"Sit." Ginny commanded.

"Actually, I've been moved to the staff table. I'm apprenticing my job sooner than expected. Flitwick will be leaving ahead of schedule, so I'm already on staff." I said sheepishly. Ginny, Ron, Neville, and Harry were the only ones who looked sad about this. "I'll see you guys after breakfast." I waved and walked to the empty seat that was conveniently between Severus and Headmistress McGonagall. Severus's eyes didn't move from me as I walked up onto the dais, around the table and to my seat. "Good morning." I said cheerfully, brushing my thigh against my colleague's. He smiled approvingly.

"Good morning Miss Granger." His baritone voice was sexier than ever. I couldn't keep the huge grin from my face, even if I tried. His hand slid from the table and squeezed my bare knee. I kept my squeal in by biting my lower lip. That earned a small growl from him. "Did you receive your Christmas gift?" He asked, leaning over to me casually as if he were simply commenting on the weather.

"I did. I plan to thank you in person when my apprenticeship is over this evening." I said as I took a sip from my pumpkin juice. Ginny was staring up at me curiously, Harry's gaze following. I winked in their direction and began eating. McGonagall took the absence of Snape's words to begin conversation over what I would be paid as well as when my first day as a professor would be. Severus listened, though to anyone else, they wouldn't be able to tell. He had resumed his expressionless mask and was focused on his food. Minerva received an owl and excused herself from the table. "How did you sleep Professor?" I asked demurely.

"Not as well as I would if I had had some exercise beforehand. But it was fair."

"I offered." I pointed out as I took a piece of fruit and ate it. When I saw a strawberry among the various fruits, I couldn't stop an evil grin from gracing my lips. I waited for him to answer before picking it up.

"Yes, you did. But…" his sentence trailed as he watched me repeat my process from our first day together with the strawberry. My peripheral vision caught Harry choking on his pumpkin juice as he watched us and Ginny outright trembling with laughter. When I had eaten the whole thing and picked up a forkful of eggs I raised my eyebrows to him. "That was beyond punishment, even for you." He couldn't keep the huskiness from his voice as he glared at me. I giggled. "Watch yourself Miss Granger." I slipped my left hand from the table and let it slide onto his thigh, feeling the tip of his arousal as it strained through the material.

"I'll watch myself arouse you all day, Severus." His face remained bland as always, but his eyes glinted dangerously. I took my hand back slowly, a coy smile on my face and went back to my food. He took several deep breaths to steady himself but made no further comment.

"Severus," Madame Pomfrey's voice came from behind me after a few minutes of our silence. "I'm in need of a new batch of pepper-up potion."

"I have a box in my office. Let me go get it for you." He stood up, throwing a smoldering glance my way before he and his robes billowed out of the hall. I watched him go with a smirk and finished my breakfast. I met up with the gang in the common room as I saw three house elves hauling down my possessions.

"What's going on?" Lavender asked a little too excitedly.

"Winky," I called as she passed me with her arms full of my books. "What's happening?"

"Headmistress McGonagall said we were to bring Professor Granger's things from the Gryffindor Tower to her new chambers." She replied cheerfully.

"It seems I am to get my teaching chambers. Come on." I invited as I followed Winky out. They came with me, their enthusiasm showing. We were led down several staircases and through four corridors before we were brought to a portrait of a handsome man resembling Mr. Darcy himself. Minerva knew me far too well, I thought as I stood in front of him.

"My Lady," he bowed. The portrait opened for us and we went in to see a sitting room with a roaring fire waiting for us. It had bookshelves on all four walls, plush red carpets were spread over the floor and a couch with matching chairs centered in the room. The window faced the lake. I moved around the room and found the door to my bed chambers and my bathroom. The bed was king-sized and four-postered, set with large warm blankets and at least six pillows that I could see. There were even more bookshelves and each one filled with books. Minerva must have done this. The red drapes that covered the bed frame were thick and soft as I touched them. The Victorian style clawed-footed porcelain tub was simply gorgeous, as well as the matching sink and fixtures. The fire in my room was softer than the one in the study and I added a log to it. The room smelt of peppermint. I smiled softly as I sat on the edge of my bed. When I returned to the sitting room, Winky and the other house elves were bringing in the rest of my things.

"Thank you all so much." I said. They bowed with eager grins and disappeared. Harry and Ron were sitting comfortably on my couch while Lavender glowered in a corner

"Wow…" Ginny said after she had spun around. "I wanna be a professor." Her eyes found mine. I laughed and began looking at the books. I think I have more than Severus now. Each shelf was organized by genre and author. My fingers danced over each title excitedly. Just then, Minerva was in the doorway, her eyes glowing as she saw my enthusiasm.

"I hope you find everything satisfactory." She said melodiously, that twinkle in her eye that reminded me so much of Albus.

"More than satisfactory, Minerva, thank you so much." I resisted the urge to hug her like a child and stood by my fire.

"Now, I think you should be left to get yourself settled while the rest of you go unpack and get started on the homework that you all have avoided." They all, including Ginny, turned away from her eyes. "That's what I thought. As soon as they leave, Miss Granger, you are to make a password for your door, understood?" I nodded and walked everyone out. I did as she said, looking at the gorgeous man and telling him my password, 'persuasion'. I went back in and started hanging up my pictures of my friends and putting away my books. When I picked up the Christmas gift from Severus I went to my room and placed on the side table, reading the inscription again. Warm tingles ran up and down my stomach and spine. I wondered if Severus was aware of my move. Once I was settled I headed to Flitwick's and he began teaching me how to instruct. I watched for the first class, seeing how he answered questions and looked over his lesson plans. When the next class came in, he asked me to sit in with his students, critiquing them and offering in any thoughts I had that may be beneficial to the class. By then it was time for lunch and we walked together to the Great Hall. Severus was not yet there so I sat in my chair and decided to order some tea and a sandwich. Severus never came. Nor did Minerva. Something in the pit of my stomach began to churn, as if signaling that something was wrong. I resumed my progress in Flitwick's room and was pleasantly surprised that I got the hang of it. By the end of the day, I was feeling more confident about taking the job earlier than planned.

"I knew we wouldn't have to worry Miss Granger." Flitwick said cheerily while we were cleaning up the room.

"Thank you professor. You're confidence in me means so much." I replied while waving my wand at the last bit of trash on the floor. He beamed up at me and bid me a good evening before walking out of the room. I looked around the area for a bit before exiting. I was on my way to the dungeons when Ginny caught me by the arm and pulled me into an empty classroom.

"Okay, now spill." She commanded, not even saying a quick hello. I smiled at her impatience and sat down on one of the desks. I gestured for her to do the same and she did so ungracefully. I then proceeded to tell her the entire story of my Christmas vacation, including all the naked details but barring the ministry interruption. The last thing I needed was her to worry right now. She squealed with delight by the end. "It's about bloody time!" She launched herself at me and smothered my face with kisses.


End file.
